Celebrity planners Anthony Miller and Richard Jones solve your wedding worries. For more see weddingsbyanthonyandrichard.co.uk
Limited guest list
One of my best friends is getting married but hasn't invited my long-term partner. I'm angry she's not included him, but also understand numbers are tight. Is it acceptable to wait for people to drop out and then maybe he can be included?
Katrina, London
Anthony says: "Funny you should ask Katrina – a similar thing is going on with a client at present! From experience, I can only assume that she doesn't view your partner as a friend, and perhaps won't enjoy their company. Sorry if this sounds harsh but honey, honesty is the best policy. Ask yourself why she hasn't invited him: have there been awkward situations? Whatever the reason, she has come to a difficult decision. Will she change her mind? Probably not! Perhaps you could ask her if there is any ill-feeling you are unaware of and if you can do anything to alleviate it. Whatever the outcome, remember this is her big day and she has the right to invite whoever she likes."
Pregnant bridesmaid
My bridesmaid has just told me that she's pregnant and will be about six months gone at my wedding. Should I keep her or find someone else? It's a big responsibility and I don't want to stress her out, plus I need someone I can rely on!
Clare, North Wales
Anthony says: "Sweetie, only you can answer this! Did you choose her initially for her ability to be prompt, organised and reliable, or because you've known her for ages and she'll look fab in photos? Being six months pregnant is not paralysing – you may have to be gentler with her, but I can't think of any bridesmaid functions that are prohibited by a lovely baby bump. Do you want her as a bridesmaid? If so then it should be fine – hey, at least you will have a sober help. But if you chose her through obligation, well my darling, what a perfect opportunity to replace her!"
Alternative gifts
Our son gets married in May – they have a house already and want gift vouchers or money instead of gifts. How do we word this on a gift list?
Confused mum, Bath
Richard says: "We are asked this a lot and I've seen some lovely wording. I like: “As we have a home already full of things we don't need, your company at our special day truly is gift enough, but, should you feel you have to buy us a present, gift vouchers for Debenhams would be wonderful.” Alternatively, create a honeymoon gift list so guests contribute to the holiday, which feels more like a gift. Visit www.myhoneymoon.co.uk and www.trailfinders.com/giftlist"
Favour ideas
I've been to so many weddings where guests leave the favours – what a waste! Do you have any alternative ideas?
Di, Kent
Richard says: "You're right, you see tables full of boxes with unwanted sweets or sugared almonds. It's an expense that can seem wasteful. If you still want to do favours, make them personal or special. For men, try a mini bottle of whiskey or vodka. For ladies, try candles or a lipstick for just £3.99 from Boots – think of the points! Get someone to grab leftover gifts at the end of the night that you can keep or give out later. There's always someone who will forget their gift!"
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